When I think of forgiveness, my mind always goes to what Jesus did on the cross. It goes to Him screaming out “Father forgive them for they know not what they do.”
It goes to the prostitute who was about to be stoned for her adultery and Jesus says, “I’ll give my stone to the first man who can say that have not committed sin.”
It goes to the two men hanging on the cross, one who speaks pridefully to Jesus and says “why not get down from the cross and save yourself”, and the other, who knew that Jesus was innocent and was dying a death meant for the criminals.
It goes to Jesus breaking bread with His disciples during the last supper right before Judas betrayed Him, and how He still fed Judas.
It goes to King David, when he committed those horrible sins, and when he repented said, “Against you, you only, have I sinned”.
It goes to the Pharisees who are accusing Jesus of blasphemy when He heals the lame man by forgiving His sins. They said, “only God can forgive the sins of man.”
There was a time when I would think of forgiveness and be reminded of my childhood. I would think of those who offended me or spiritually wounded me. Or the times when I committed sins against someone else. It grieves me now to know of all the times I withheld forgiveness from others. All the time I was storing up debt that I had no authority to pardon.
And that is the problem, right? That there is this belief that we are in the position to forgive someone’s sin. At the very most, we can extend grace, but their sin was paid on that cross. Whether we hold on to it or not.
The Pharisee was right, only God can pardon the sins of man.
In all those examples that I shared about forgiveness, we never understood that we have always been on the other side of forgiveness. Not the one who needs to forgive but the one who needs to be forgiven.
His word says to forgive as God has forgiven you.
Those who withhold forgiveness do not have an accurate understanding of themselves. Those that we withhold forgiveness from, are they not like us? Do we all not fall short? Do we all not sin? Somehow, we have come to a place that has allowed us to believe we have the right to withhold from one another, all the while God is saying, “do as I have done.”
Not because we are justified in forgiving sin, but because when we really needed forgiveness, He gave it to us freely. The only requirement was repentance.
Does it not say that revenge is for Him? Why? Because we can’t even be trusted to judge ourselves correctly. How can we be trusted to bring justice to others?
Why was Jesus willing to give His stone to the one who can say they are without sin? So, they can recognize that they are not without it. If the adulterous woman’s sin is worthy of death, is not ours also?
When someone sins against you, its God that they sin against. Because all sin goes against God who is holy & righteous. There is no sin in Him. Jesus died on the cross so that we may be reconciled to God. Why? Because those who commit crimes are criminals. When a law is broken, is there not a consequence for that crime? But is it the person who the crime was committed against who determines the penalty for that offense or the judge?
Are we not just one criminal committing a crime against another criminal? “Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do?” Right? Because at one time, we didn’t fully understand the debt which we had and how much it really cost to cover it. And yet, He pardoned us.
My prayer is that we see forgiveness according to the truth and that when we see someone’s offense against us, that we don’t see them, we see ourselves standing there. That the Holy Spirit reminds us, that when He was screaming out to the Father to forgive us, that it was us that He was praying for. When we understand that, then we know grace.
Sinners4christ 
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