It’s been awhile since I have written. I wish i could say that its been because I’ve just been busy with other things, but that wouldn’t be the truth. I let the enemy discourage me from writing or doing things because I believed the lies.
It’s hard to wrap your mind around spiritual warfare. It’s crazy to think that there is something going on behind the scenes that is just wanting you to fail. And even crazier to base your whole life on things that you can’t see. I’ve posted a lot about God answering prayers and doing things for me to get my attention, and it hasn’t been any different. The Lord is still there. It’s me that let myself be overcome with this spiritual battle.
Today my husband got baptized. He gave his life to God and took his place in our family to be the priest of the household. The man I’ve been with for 6 years, is now a person I haven’t met. Someone I never knew. He’s encouraging, hes uplifting, he prays for me and with me, and the days that are the hardest for me He is there. Hes patient and kind. The complete opposite of who I have known. God knows how long i prayed to see these days. To see him be the man that he is at this moment.
But a huge part believes that God knew the valley that i would be in. This darkest place in my walk that is plagued with doubt. So, because He works things out perfectly, He knew that i would see this change as something that could only come from him. He knew how badly i needed to know that He was with me. No matter how i feel, i cant doubt that. I mean after all, i know my husband better than anyone else. So, i thank God for working things out the way they should be. And i thank God for saving my husband’s life and for all the things Hes done in him. But most importantly, I’m thankful that nothing can separate me from Him. I’m thankful that my Lord has yet to not show up when it is desperately needed.
Yes, this is a spiritual battle. The enemy does want to destroy everything God has ever graciously given you. And no, he won’t stop for anything. My soul has been tested in more ways than one and challenged in ways no one can fully understand. In ways, that i have yet to understand. But i believe that is why the Lord asks you to walk by faith and not by sight. Because the things that are bigger than us, can not be seen. Like the bigger picture. It’s easier to be overcome when you doubt, and even easier to fall apart when you have strayed from His truth. You come to a point in your walk where you become so dependent on the Lord, and when you pull away or spiritually drift you face a lot of chaos. You can easily be overtaken. It’s by the grace of God and his love for us that he continually pursues us. We might be in a valley, but no place is too low that God can’t bring you back out of. We overcome because He overcame first. And we can rest on that because God’s word says:
“These things I have spoken unto you, that in me you might have peace. In the world you shall have tribulation; but be of good cheer; I have over come the world. John 16:33”